Word Of The Day

My Wife and I were talking the other day, and I mentioned the reasons why I married her. Short answer: It wasn't for love.

She was a smidge peeved at that. I thought I mentioned it to her before, but apparently I hadn't.

I'm not a strong proponent of marriage. As an impudent youth, I made myself a couple of cardinal rules for my future. One of them was to never marry. Live with someone, sure, but not marriage. Marriage just doesn't have the impact it once did. I mean, it used to be that marriage was a tool to build alliances between families and gain power. These days, you wind up with pretty much the same benefits of just living with someone. And sometimes people change, and go off in different directions. If the schism becomes too great, then both suffer, and the marriage ends in divorce, or worse. I've seen it happen more than a few times.

As for my Wife, she has always been an ardent defender of her independence and individuality. If she suspected someone of even remotely trying to usurp her autonomy, her retribution would be swift and merciless. This included relationships. She avoided them like the plague. I've known this about her pretty much since day one. Since, well, we dated.

So this fiercely independent woman took me out to dinner one year on my birthday, and proposed. I said yes, and broke one of my cardinal rules.

I didn't marry her for love, because she already had mine. I married her because she was willing to risk giving up the most essential aspects of her life for me, to risk losing her sense of self. She was pretty much willing to risk everything.

Then she upped the ante and took my name to boot. She was full of surprises that year.